I have seen a healthy gamut of weddings, all of them special for their own reasons. There is a charm and feeling that comes from an intimate wedding in front of a cottage overlooking a vineyard that is distinct from one that might have a guest list into the hundreds. I feel that these larger events are at no deficit of “connectedness” or emotion, but the scale sometimes necessitates that the bridal couple share their emotional energies with their guests rather than between themselves; this isn’t a fault or a misstep, but is natural when a couple is amongst so many of those who care and love them.

In this way, a characteristic of larger weddings is the tremendous energy trading between the couple and their guests. This is why big weddings “feel big”, and it’s really great to take part in it. This wedding on which I assisted Duy Ho Photography in Napa was notable for its scale and details. Hundreds of guests hosted on an expansive, California wine country resort? Check. A beautiful bridal party almost 20 strong? For sure. Choreographed dance numbers, heartfelt speeches, studio lights shining on a big dance floor in the middle of a beautifully decorated event hall with high centerpieces? You got it. Oh, how about a bridesmaid on a hot pink electric violin covering Daft Punk and Calvin Harris to get the dance floor going? Yeah, that happened.

Despite all of that, what is special about that day is that as distance in time grows larger from it, the smaller this wedding it feels to me. A few months on from this wedding, all that really sticks out to me was the intense connection between the bride and groom. What comes immediately to mind when I see any of these photos are all the times the groom would look intently into his bride’s eyes, not break gaze, a tell her how much she means to him and how happy he is; the way the bride would look at the groom and hang on his every word smiling with tears of joy welling up in her eyes. How the enormous, beautiful reception room seemed to disappear around the couple during their first dance.

For all the grand preparation, awesome floral arrangements, and concert atmosphere, what I remember most about this wedding day are the bride and groom at the center who, together, outshone the spectacle of their big wedding by making it small.